【搞笑向】BT的戒烟25法

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中英对照版《25 Ways to Quit Smoking》
1.hire someone to watch over you (雇佣某人来盯着你，当你吸烟时一屁股坐死你)
2.remove the orifice of entry (揭下你那罪恶的入口-你的嘴)
3.use heat-seeking missiles (使用热跟踪式导弹，以期以毁灭的方式结束你的恶性)
4.make it hard to light up (在那里，点火是一件很极耗体力的艰难过程，爱斯基摩)
5.make it hard to light up 2 (利用火的天敌，使吸烟变得无可能，海底世界)
6.learn how to keep dangerous smoke from entering your lungs (拧断你的脖子提起你的脑袋避免有害物质伤及你的肺)
7.seek divine intervention (寻求神的介入)
8.seek more divine intervention (继续期待神的帮助)
9.use aversion therapy (厌恶疗法)
10.lock your cigarettes in a car on a hot day (炎炎夏日将它们锁在你的车子里让它们尽情的呼救)
11.empathize with the cigarette (移情)
12.close off the entrance (封锁入口)
13.try different lighters (换个点火装置)
14.notice how smoking ages you (注意吸烟是怎样使你一夜苍老的)
15.use a smoke alarm (装个烟雾警报器，在？)
16.hide your cigarette (把它们藏起来)
17.close off the air passage way (阻断气管)
18.overindulge (放纵，破罐子破摔)
19.use safer orifices (利用更健康安全的通道，肚脐眼 儿)
20.try to breathe free (咳出来，你的肺自由了)
21.join african tribe (加入非洲部落)
22.keep a pet tobacco beetle (收养一只烟草宠物)
23.use self-discipline (自制，自我惩罚)
24.imagine your life if you lost your mouth to canser (幻想着加入你没有嘴巴)
25.take a good look at your lungs (认真仔细看看你的肺)
congratulations you’ve quit! now you can walk in the fresh air and breath free (恭喜你，你成功了，你可以自由的呼吸新鲜空气了，然后，于是，返回第一条。。。)